Is our understanding of
physiology going backwards? The head of the Education
Agency in Prabumlih, South Sumatra, announced in mid-August that female
senior high school students would in 2014 be subjected to compulsory virginity
tests.
Virginity tests are a physical
impossibility. Some women, whales, elephants and chimps have a perceptible elastic membrane
at the opening of the tube which connects their wombs to the outside world.
Some do not. Whether any object has ever been inserted into this tube CANNOT be
discerned by physical examination.
Although the daft proposal has been criticized
by other Indonesians, and withdrawn, it is not an isolated phenomenon.
Virginity tests have recently been documented by Human Rights Watch in many
other places including Egypt, Afghanistan and India.
How can this be? The ancient Greeks,
however deplorably sexist, long ago knew that the only proof a woman had experienced
penetrative sex with a man was when she produced a baby. One medical writer,
Soranus (yes, that really is his name) mentions the hymen, but only to deny its
existence.
Being a virgin, parthenos, was a social status meaning that a woman was believed not to be having sex or to have been
pregnant and was marriageable. This status could be faked, in which case you
were a pseudoparthenos.
Indonesians might just as well adopt the
sort of virginity test we do hear
about in Greek literature, in a novel by Achilles Tatius.[i]
The heroine, Leucippe, is enclosed inside a cave of Pan. If the crowd hears the
music of the syrinx (panpipes made of reeds) then she is a virgin. If they hear
a scream and she vanishes, then she is not a virgin. Leucippe, a resourceful young woman, passes with
flying colours.
The beauty of this test is the ease with
which the right result can be furnished. It would not be hard to secrete a
small set of panpipes in your flowing robes. I also appreciate the sexiness of the
setting. Everyone in ancient myth knows that the place to go for an erotic encounter is a cave.
Since Pan is the horniest of deities, if you were a virgin before you entered
his cavern, you were unlikely to be one when you left it. And the reeds constituting
Pan's pipes had once been the beautiful virgin Syrinx, who was transformed
into this plant when pursued by the randy goat-god.
I propose that societies where virginity is an issue implement the Pan-cave test instead. It would be easier to administer and much more enjoyable. Both men and women could undergo it. They could play a tune on their own in a cave, or
even flirt there with Pan. The examiners would be relieved of their task and get to listen to some music. The result would be just as reliable. What's not to like?
[i] Brilliantly
introduced and translated by Helen
Morales and Tim Whitmarsh in the Oxford World’s Classics series.
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